Jan 01 2009
What do you do when your mom won’t take (or can’t find) all of her medicine?
We’re having a problem with getting Mom to take all of her medicine. She uses a daily patch to help slow down the progress of Alzheimer’s disease, two pills to help with her anxiety and depression, and medication to control high cholesterol and high blood pressure. She is adamant about being in control of her medication. She keeps them all in her room and becomes defensive when we question her. Sometimes, she outright lies, “Yes, I’m taking all of my medicines!” Only to forget what she said earlier to admit, “Well, some of them I don’t take ALL the time.” Some of the problem is her confusion about the dosage. She swore she used the daily patch “faithfully,” but I noticed her 30-day supply was stretching beyond a month. “Well, doesn’t every 24 hours mean every other day?” she asked innocently. We got the patch straightened out, but she still does not take the other medication properly. She has plenty of excuses such as, “They make me sick,” “I feel better when I don’t take them,” “They say (‘they’ being anyone on the news or a T.V. show) not to take old medicine,” or “They say that some doctors prescribe medicine you don’t really need.” I’ve also noticed sometimes she can’t find her medicine.
We recently needed to compare all the available Medicare Part D plans to find a better one. I needed all of her medications to make sure they were covered. She had a very difficult time finding them because they are all in different drawers or boxes in her room. I suggested that she should keep them all together. She agreed, but who knows if she will actually do it… Does anyone have any ideas? I think she is clinging to the control of her medications as one of her last pieces of independence. I want to help her without breaking her spirit…
I would suggest asking your pharmacist if they can be prepared in blister packs for her… then it could be this is the way they come now; isn’t that cool? So much more convenient … and would be a new and better way rather than you taking over from her.
If that doesn’t work though, you’re going to have to take it over eventually … and probably already should. It’s not just a matter of her forgetting to take - there is just SO much risk in someone with Alzheimers forgetting that they have already taken it and doing it again - and again.
With my ma-in-law, the meds were one of the biggest sticking points in our early going… I had no sooner moved in than I was taking over…and she was PISSED. But it had to be done; I could not stay here and remain idle while she totally messed them up - and she WAS totally messing them up.
I started by just waiting until she was out one evening, going into her room and taking EVERYTHING. I poured a weeks worth into a dosette and at first, she managed taking from there (resentfully and muttering about SHE taking over and thinking SHE could be the boss of the world LOL) …. as she continued to deteriorate I had to take the week’s worth away and just give her a day at a time … until of course, eventually we had to take over altogether for her.
it sucks to have to be “bossy” and controlling - but sometimes you just have to do it.
Hi Flit,
Thanks for the great tips. I had not thought about the blister packs, we’ll give that a try. I’m also getting ready to set up an appt. with her general care physician (the one who prescribed most of her pills). I’m going to ask that she explain why it is important to take them and if she has any ideas to keep Mom on track. Sometimes hearing things from someone other than me helps. But you’re right. At some point I will have to be the boss. It’s just a strange transition to switch roles and be in charge of a parent, LOL.